Change

So, I admit it. I'm a boring blogger. Not much I want to post about, other than things that would require more than 10 minutes to post. So, like everything else, they don't get done. Go figure. If you're lucky that will change.

I've been struggling lately with what a friend termed "peter panning". You see, in some ways I'm barely holding life together. In others I'm doing very well. But really, what it all comes down to is that I'm mostly surviving right now instead of living.

Yes, there's a difference.

In the process of building a new computer I realized just how much fun I have doing that. And how much fun I have doing other things. The problem seems to be finding the time. It seems like I'm always trying to get the "important" stuff done and there's never enough time for leisure, with some exception in my computer gaming. (Note that while computer gaming is fun for me, it's not exactly a lasting experience -- once the game is over the fun is gone as well. There's a challenge there that I find satisfying but ultimately hollow. Probably one reason why my gaming is on a downward swing... but anyhow. That's a whole other post)

This is reflected in my job as well -- I'm frequently taking it in the shorts to get some of the necessary stuff done. Part of it I suppose is that I'm too dependable for that kind of thing. Part is that because I'm knowledgeable in certain areas that others aren't. And I'm starting to wonder if part of it isn't my own choices biting me.

So. Where do you draw the line between what you want to do and what needs doing? How do you even determine what really needs doing?

Yeah, I have some idea, but I'm not sure I could express it well at the moment. With a few "Aha" moments lately for me I think I am beginning to change. But I'm not sure where that change is taking me, or even if I fully understand that change myself.

What I can say is that I'm realizing I've been pidgeon-holed by my corner of society's expectations and rules and my standard has met those expectations. I haven't made my own for myself, or in some areas, even understood that there are different/further boundaries to press towards.

This is kind of a vague post, but I'm not really sure how to name what I'm experiencing. There's a lot to be said for naming something -- it makes it real for your own little slice of reality, touchable, explainable, understandable. But regardless. I want to understand. And I desire change.

Computer

So, some decisions have been made. The computer parts are purchased. I am using the monitor now. The CPU and RAM are all that are left to create a functional machine, and they are both on the truck for delivery. I'm going to have to find an excuse to go home from work early today! Ahh, who needs an excuse. I'll just take the time off. =)

Another time I'll go into how and why (fun and less $$) I build my own computer.

Today I'll jsut tell you all what components I'm putting into it.

As I stated in my post a while back, I was really thinking that having a core 2 duo would be fantastic. Once I saw how much they go for, I decided to build a computer around it. (check here for some general pricing)

I decided to get the mid-range 2.13 Ghz core 2 duo chip that (I think) I linked to in my previous post. I ended up getting this one, though I ordered it for a few bucks cheaper previously from another company. This was last thursday evening. On monday morning the CPU still hadn't shipped and wasn't going to until tuesday, so I called them and cancelled. ZipZoomFly had it for free shipping, so upgrading it to overnight (so it got here today, wednesday) was only $12. Worth it to have it a day or two early.

So, I had the processor, but which motherboard to choose? I looked around a bunch, but couldn;t find many straight answers until I came to a good article on AnandTech. They did the hard work of testing the viable options of motherboards and such. I believe it was in that article that helped me NOT make a couple mistakes buying a motherboard and at the end they suggested this motherboard for a reasonable price. I was sold.

The other tough choice was the video card. I selected a GeForce 7600 GT after everything else was ordered. Again Anandtech had a great article about current video cards. For the price, the 7600 can't be beat right now, at least in my price range. I just refuse to spend more than $300 on a video card.

Most of the components are easier to find and not as essential.

I wanted good RAM, so I picked up two gigabytes. This wasn't lowest or highest price and seemed to have very few bad reports. Two Gigabytes seem like a lot, but especially while playing games I've hit the wall with my current 1 gig, so I thought I'd push it to two. Last time I only bought half of what I wanted at first and regretted it -- eventually upgrading to the full amount. May as well start with the stuff I want since I'm spending money like I have too much of it.

The rest was pretty straightforward. I needed a new case and a power supply that was 400 watts or greaeter, so I chose this one. A blue neon tiger. Wooooooo! Kind of silly, but hey, I'm sure it impresses someone. The kids like it anyway. =)

I got a super duper all in one DVD/CDR burner that appears to do it all. I thought about getting 2 drives, but it was cheaper to get them all together. If I burned more CDs or DVD's I may have gotten two, but it'll mostly be for backups and such. I'm really not much of a pirate anymore.

My old computer had a 40 gigabyte hard drive that was in 3 partitions -- Two 10 gig partitions and a 20 gig one. Boy was that cramped. It'll be nice to have a 250 gig SATA drive and not worry so much about space.

The Mouse and Keyboard are pretty standard.

And the monitor. Just... WOW. I never realized how big a difference going from 1024x768 to 1680x1050 could be! Good stuff. I can't say enough good things about this monitor and it's one of my favorite parts of all of this.

I'll post more about the software side later, due to this post's length and me actually making another post this week. I'm too busy playing to do much else...

until then.

Tag?

I hate these things.

Due to pressure from a number of people I'll be doing this. BUT! I make no promises that it'll happen in the future.

4 jobs I've had:
1. Current -- Phone book publishing software programming. We make and sell software to help people get 2-3 phone books in an area instead of just one. That may be good or bad depending on your take.
2. Little Caesar's Pizza
3. Paper route
4. Computer tech support. (Anyone remember, Pionex, Cybermax or Inteva computers? Yeah, I did support for those)

4 movies I could watch over and over:
Kind of different than all time favorites, but good overlap I guess on that with these:
1. Ocean's 11 (and maybe 12)
2. The Negotiator
3. U.S. Marshall's
4. The Bourne Identity

4 Places I have lived:
1. Lots of places in Utah (7 different cities/towns)
2. Detroit Michigan. (Downtown Detroit, not suburbs, but only for 6 months)
3. Various other places in the Detroit Michigan area (8 I think including detroit, but only a few months at any given place)
4. Online

4 TV shows I love to watch:
This is a bit out of date, I rarely watch real TV anymore. Movies mostly, but even that not so much.
1. Law & Order
2. Everyone Loves Raymond
3. Firefly
4. Farscape

4 places I have been on vacation:
1. Disneyland
2. Bear Lake
3. Las Vegas
4. Midway, UT (Bed & breakfast for a getaway)

4 websites I visit daily:
Not sure if there are 4 that I visit daily, but here goes.
1. slashdot
2. WoW guild forum
3. My Yahoo Page, Mostly for mail (Mr. Pinabll Classifieds listing)
4. My blog links, and of course, this blog.

4 favorite foods:
1. Pizza
2. Bread
3. Popcorn
4. Pumpkin Pie & Gingerbread cookies (this was a tie)

4 places I'd like to be right now:
1. At home building my new computer
2. An uninhabited pacific island. With internet. And a laptop. And my wife.
3. On Vacation (with kids).
4. On Vacaion (without kids)

4 people I am tagging:
I'm such a rebel. (According to my wife I'm a tag loser, but I prefer rebel)
No tags 4 U! However, if you read this feel free to play and post about it here.

Edit:
Check this out! That'd be a fun toy to play with.

Yup...

... I've known that I am an INFP since I was an early teen. Knowing this helps me to know myself.

But it's also fun to see what other people think I am.


Harry Potter Personality Quiz by Pirate Monkeys Inc.

Thanks to sushi for reminding me. =)

Here is a link that may explain more about an INFP, which is basically the type of person I am. I chose one that's closer to me than others, if you google "INFP" or any of the other personality type combinations, you get a ton of results. And they don't always agree.

I have ordered a number of computer parts. Everything has shipped except the keyboard and the CPU, most parts arriving next wednesday.

I also worked some on the basement today.

Happy weekend.

uh, what?

So I heard this story on the radio yesterday on my way home from work.

Apparently 2 U.S. border patrol agents are getting up to 20 years in prison for... chasing after an illegal alien who attacked one of them and then made a run for the border. The illegal had a car/truck/van/whatever with about 700lbs of marijuana in it.

The illegal got his medical expenses paid and immunity for testifying against the border patrol guys. Check here for a better explanation of the story. This happened 18 months ago.

Assuming this is true... just wow. How lame is that.

I also heard today (unconfirmed by another source) that the army reserve that are patrolling the border are unable to have their M-16's loaded even though they are carrying them around. So they have border patrol guys guarding them. How screwed up is that?

This country amazes me sometimes.

In a completely unrelated note, I will be building a new computer in the next week or so. I'm thinking of starting here and moving on from there. Any advice?

Programming

So, I'm a computer programmer.

Some days it's great. People love you because you help them get their job done easier.

And some days it makes your eyes bleed.

But I can't complain, I get paid well and can basically set my schedule. We get free drinks and goodies in the break room. I don't have to deal with a ton of corporate BS in a small company. I'll probably never be rich doing this, but I will be able to make enough to keep my wife at home (as long as she chooses to do so) with the kids.

I'm an apple developer, so it's a little different than in the windows world. I get to use the cooler looking 17" Mac laptops and we get to watch Steve Jobs work his magic with crowds. And because we are paying apple for the "privilege" of being developers they are nice enough to send us t-shirts, new copies of their upcoming operating system and give us discounts on new machines. Among other things.

If you've got a little time you can check out some of the new exciting things apple is going to be coming out with in the next 6 months or so. I'm really excited about the virtual desktops they will be coming out with, which they call "spaces". If you've never thought about or don't quite understand virtual desktops check out this link here.

Anyhow, I don't want to be taken as a zealot, but I am excited about some of the upcoming changes for apple's new OS. And since the switch to intel processors for apple, I'm considering buying a Mac -- you know, and dual boot it. =)



On a vaguely related note, someone contacted a friend and I about a game that we programmed in high school. It was for an old bulletin board system called Hermes. If you don't know what a "BBS" is click here. Anyhow, the guy set up his bulletin board with our (somewhat feeble, unfinished) game. He also set up his bulletin board here if you'd like to log on, create an account, jump into the externals section, and try out the game. There are a lot of inside jokes in there... Maybe I'll post about it if anyone is interested.

More later.

Am I?

So am I addicted?

Work is progressing on the basement. Slowly. I hope to have the family room lights powered and ready (at least for temporary light fixtures) this weekend, though extended family activities may preclude that. I'll post pictures when there's something interesting to post. =)

Oh, and I've been ignoring my MAME post for a few weeks now. Gotta get back to that.

See you later.

Drills

So, I have actually been working on the basement some. Yes, some of the wire is actually run. Nothing's hooked up, and it needs stapled down, etc. but I've run some cable. That was easy.

Getting my drill to fit in some of the places where I need wiring holes isn't so easy.

I thought briefly about purchasing a right angle drill -- how much could they be, right? (hint: I guessed wrong, they are usually more than $250)

After shooting that idea down I did some more looking and found this. How cool is that?

I ordered it July 29th. I finally got around to checking the tracking number today. Yeah, it will be here August 11th.

sigh.

Time to start something else down there while I wait. Maybe the lights in the family room need strung up. We'll see how far I get tomorrow on that.

Until later.

??? 0.o

If you like brain teasers...

This is an interesting link that you may like. I thought it was pretty cool. Fairly easy to get to lvl 4 (all of a minute), it gets harder after that.

Enjoy.

Hmm

Sometimes I wonder what I'm thinking. Here I am, absent for over a week and then I taunt you all with a teeny post.

Ohwell, you'll ahve to get over it. I already have.

I'm not sure it's a good idea but... regardless, I'm going to post this anyway. Too bad they won't be out until later in the year or I'd pick me one up for my birthday.

Happy Tuesday.